When your baby wakes up in the middle of the night do you ever wonder, “Is she actually hungry again? Or does she just want me back in the room?”
It can be difficult to tell.
Babies communicate their needs and their wants by crying. So, if your baby’s awake crying in the night – once, twice, three times, or heaven-forbid more – it can be tough to determine when they’re hungry and when they’re just looking for some company.
And being the loving mom that you are, you want to ensure your baby’s getting enough food. But you also need to get some sort of quality sleep if you want to be able to function the next day. And your baby needs quality sleep just as much as you do!
So, how can you tell if your baby’s nighttime wake-ups are genuinely due to hunger?
Ask yourself these 6 questions…
1. Is Baby Under 6 Months Old?
Up until about the six-month mark, some babies need at least one nighttime feed. Their tummies are small, breastmilk and formula digest fairly quickly, and most haven’t started solid food yet. So, some babies may genuinely be hungry for at least one feed a night.
However, this isn’t always the case. Some babies start sleeping through the night without any feeds by as early as 10-13 weeks and then consume all the calories they need during the day.
*Important reminder: Unless your baby naturally drops all nighttime feeds or you get direction from your pediatrician, you can expect at least one nighttime feed until your baby’s about six months old.
2. Is Baby Eating Enough During the Day?
Once a baby’s capable of sleeping through the night without a feed, you want to make sure they’re getting the calories they need during their daytime hours.
You may want to add in an extra feed during the day, or add 1-2 ounces to each bottle throughout the day. This is also a great time to think about introducing solid foods. Although starting your baby on solid foods doesn’t necessarily mean they’ll immediately start sleeping through the night, it’ll start a calorie shift, where they start consuming more calories during the day and then less calories are required at night.
*Important Reminder: Before you attempt to make any changes to your baby’s feeding schedule, talk to your pediatrician. Nighttime sleep is awesome, but calories are essential. If your baby is underweight or not growing as fast as they should be, it might not be a good idea to drop night feeds.
3. Is Baby Falling Asleep Quickly When You Feed Them?
Does this scenario sound familiar? You put your baby to bed for the night and he wakes up crying 45 minutes later. You go in and offer a feed which he eagerly accepts, he eats for a few minutes, and then promptly falls asleep in the middle of it.
If this is happening frequently, it’s a good sign that your baby’s feeding for comfort instead of hunger. Babies who are genuinely hungry will usually eat until they’re full, whereas those who are feeding for comfort tend to drift off pretty quickly once they’ve gotten what they’re looking for.
4. Does Baby Sleep for a Good Stretch After Feeding?
If your baby does take a full feed at night, she should be able to sleep for about 3-4 hours afterwards. An average sleep cycle for babies around six months of age is between 45 minutes to one hour. So, if they’re waking up around 45 minutes to one hour after they eat, it’s likely that they’re dependent on the sucking and soothing actions of your feeding routine to get to get to sleep.
5. Will Baby Go Back to Sleep Without a Feed?
Falling asleep while you’re hungry is tough, regardless of your age. Your brain recognizes hunger as a priority and will stay alert until the need is met, or until you’re exhausted enough that the need to sleep overrides the need to eat.
So, if your baby really is hungry, they usually won’t go back to sleep very easily until they’ve been fed. If they nod off after five or ten minutes of crying, that’s a pretty reliable sign that they were just looking for some help getting back to sleep and not actually in need of a feed.
6. Does Baby Fall Asleep Independently?
Here’s the core of the whole issue. Can your baby fall asleep on their own?
Can you lay your baby down in his crib when he’s still awake, leave the room, and have him fall asleep without any help from you, a pacifier, or any other kind of external help?
If the answer is no, then this is the cause of at least some (if not all) of your baby’s nighttime wake-ups. He’s looking for help getting back to sleep because he doesn’t yet know how to do it on his own.
*Important Reminder: I’m not trying to tell you that a baby who knows how to fall asleep independently will never wake up and need assistance in the night. And I’m definitely not trying to tell you that you shouldn’t respond to your baby’s crying. You know your baby better than anyone and I imagine you can tell when something needs to be addressed based on the decibel level, intensity, pitch, and duration of the cry. But, if your baby’s waking up seven or eight times a night and insisting that you come in and rock her back to sleep, that can have a serious impact on everybody’s sleep, including hers.
A lot of babies have developed a dependency on nursing, rocking, sucking, and so on, in order to get to sleep, and it’s not something they can overcome in 15 or 20 minutes. Solving that issue takes a solid action plan, some real work, and a firm commitment from you.
Determining whether your baby’s hungry at night is obviously a complicated situation. Calories are vital but so is sleep, and it can be very difficult trying to balance the importance of the two. It becomes much easier once you’ve taught your baby the skills they need to fall asleep on their own. Once the habit of feeding to sleep is broken, you can feel much more confident that their requests for a nighttime feed are out of necessity and not just a way of grabbing a few extra minutes with mom.
Ready for some help teaching your little one those essential sleep skills?
Schedule a free call with me to learn how I can help.