Night wakings and night crying are really tough things for parents to deal with. Instinctively, we want to run in there right away and solve the problem, right? We want to try to get this baby back to sleep before they pull themselves completely awake and cry the whole house down (especially if there are other children in the house)!
But, if you want your child to be able to settle themselves and sleep through the night, you’ll have to help them develop their own sleep skills. And one major piece of the puzzle is how you respond when your baby wakes in the night.
For Newborns:
If your newborn wakes up in the night, I encourage you to wait a little bit before you respond. You don’t have to wait long, even one or two minutes is plenty. It’s common for babies of all ages to have partial arousals in the night, where they come to the surface of sleep and stir or maybe even cry out a bit. And at least some of the time, your baby will fall back asleep – that is, unless we intervene too quickly. If we rush in there at the first peep, we may actually prevent them from sliding into another sleep cycle.
If, after a minute or two your baby is still fussing, you can go into her room and feed her. But try to delay the feed by changing her diaper or walking her around the room for a bit. There is some evidence to suggest that putting even a short delay between waking up and being fed reduces the number of nighttime wake-ups.
For Older Babies (6 months and up):
Now, if your baby is 6 months or older and they are still waking up in the night, first we have to take a look at bedtime. What happens in your baby’s bedtime routine? If at any point during the routine, your baby falls asleep, that’s where you have to start. So maybe they start to doze off while nursing or having a bottle, or maybe while being rocked. If you are helping your baby fall asleep (or even get sleepy) before you place them in the crib, that’s where we need to start.
If you want your child to sleep well, you’re going to have to help them learn some skills of their own so that they aren’t relying on anything external to get them to sleep in the first place.
And this is where I help by creating a customized sleep plan for your family so that together we can get solve your baby’s sleep challenges.
Once the bedtime issues are solved and your baby goes into the crib awake at bedtime, now we can deal with any night wakings.
Again, the first thing you want to do is wait. I suggest that you try to wait at least 10 minutes. Many times, a baby will fall asleep within those 10 minutes and you won’t have to intervene at all.
If, after 10 minutes your baby is still fussing, definitely go into her room and check on her. Make sure she’s safe, in a comfortable position, and that she doesn’t have a dirty diaper. And then repeat the process of how you’re helping your child learn to fall asleep independently.
A common mistake that people make is that they continue offering nighttime feeds long after their baby requires them. It’s a good idea to check with your doctor to make sure that your baby is healthy and a good weight. And if those nighttime feeds aren’t needed anymore, it’s a good idea to pull them because some babies get very confused. “Why do I get fed at this time, but not that time?” or “Why do I do bedtime on my own, but get a bit of help during the night?” So I recommend dropping nighttime feeds once your doctor says that it’s safe.
With a clear plan and a little time and patience, your baby will be sleeping through the night and you’ll be wondering why you didn’t do this sooner!
Ready to learn more about how a customized sleep plan can solve your child’s sleep struggles?
Schedule your free, no-obligation sleep evaluation today. Click here.